The Ultimate Guide to Gender Predicting With 50% Accuracy
While your bun is in the oven, it’s inevitable that friends, family, and random members of the public will chime in on the gender of your fetus. And many will do so with complete confidence, too, especially the strangers. “Congratulations, it’s a girl! I can tell by the way you’re carrying and I’ve never been wrong!” one little old lady said to my wife while she was pregnant. The lady could have just asked us – we’d already done the anatomy scan and knew it was a boy.
On that note, I scoured the internet to find as many so-called gender predicting methods as I could. None of these are made up – apparently they’re all tried-and-true methods. Yet none have a shred of science behind them, nor are they able to boast better accuracy than flipping a coin.
I know what you’re thinking, “I’m going to hack the odds by combining the results of every single method!” If you painstakingly do this, yes, you’ll come in at 90%. That is, 90% more time wasted to get the same 50% accuracy.
But, hey, this is all good clean fun for you and your lady during this exciting time.
The Chinese Birth Chart uses your wife’s age at conception and the month you did the deed to determine gender. A number of gender test websites reported this chart to be the most accurate of all these unproven methods. I’m not sure how that was decided, but if you only do one test, do this. Get some tips to make it even more accurate here.
According to the Mayans, gender prediction comes down to calendars and basic math. Just take a look at her age when she conceived and the year it happened. If both numbers are either odd or even, you’re carrying a girl. If one is odd and the other is even, it’s a baby boy. The Mayans accurately predicted the end of the world, so no reason not to trust this one. For a full chart and more info go here.
If you remember the position you and your wife used while baby-making it could give you some insight into the sex. It might be a girl if you did it missionary-style or you spooned. The logic being that female sperm aren’t as quick as their counterparts, but they live longer so these less-penetrative positions give female sperm an advantage. In contrast, if you remember going doggy-style or she was on top, a boy might be on the way. If she had an orgasm (What do you mean, “if”?!) chalk up another point for baby being a boy. Apparently an orgasm makes the vagina more alkaline and that pH shift is more hospitable to male sperm.
And in some parts of the United States, people believe if you conceive after midnight it will be a girl, while making love during the new moon means you’ll have a boy.
Food for Thought
Have her eat a clove of garlic. Does her skin reek shortly thereafter? Then it’s a boy. If there’s no hint of garlic, it’s a girl. If she refuses to swallow a clove of garlic, she’s likely carrying a vampire. Run.
Is she craving sweet stuff like ice cream and candy? Have you caught her snorting table sugar? It’s a girl. Does she crave meat or cheese, or does she keep a salt lick on her bedside table? It’s a boy.
Will she eat the dreaded heel (end-piece) of a bread loaf? It’s a boy. If not, it’s a girl. Or she’s just a human who doesn’t want a crappy piece of bread.
Is she carrying the baby high? It’s a girl. If her bump is low, it’s a boy.
Is the hair on her legs growing faster than usual? It’s a boy. But if the hair is growing extremely fast, the child may be a werewolf.
Does her face appear to be getting rounder? It’s a girl. Is her bum getting rounder? It’s a boy.
Is her skin breaking out? It’s a girl. They say that girls “steal” mom’s beauty. Are her locks glossy and her skin glowing? It’s a boy.
Check out her boobs next time she’s nude. Does her right breast look bigger than the left? It’s a boy. Vice versa? It’s a girl.
Ask a young boy to look at your lady’s belly. If he shows interest, you’re having a girl. If he doesn’t seem interested, you’re having a boy. Now leave the playground fast, because his parents just called the cops.
Has she been sick as a dog during the first trimester? (Don’t describe it like this in front of her, ever.) This indicates she’s having a girl. Sickness later in the pregnancy points to a boy.
Did she ovulate from the left ovary? It’s a girl. Right side means it’s a boy. Apparently some women have a sense of this by evaluating the pains they experience in that region?
Ask her to show you her hands. If she shows them palms-up, it means it’s a girl. If she shows you palms-down, it’s a boy. Or she’s just had a manicure.
“Accidentally” drop a key in front of her. If she picks it up by the narrow part, it’s a girl. If she picks it up by the round part it’s a boy.
Dangle a ring on a string over her belly. If it swings in a circle, it’s a boy. If it goes back and forth, you’ve got a girl. Either way your house is haunted. Run.
Take her on a dinner date. Arrive at the restaurant before she does and place a spoon under one chair and a fork under the other. Let her chose where she sits. If she sits on the chair with the spoon, you’re having a girl. The fork? It’s a boy. Then keep an eye on how she handles her napkin because one old gender test claims that if the mom-to-be picks up her napkin by the edges, a boy is on the way.
Have her pee in a cup. Mix a tablespoon of Drano in. Green means girl. Blue means boy.
In this test, you boil red cabbage, save the water, and then mix it with her urine. If the water turns pink, you are having a girl. If the water is purple, it’s a boy. As a bonus you’ll have some delicious soggy cabbage leftovers to eat.
Put some baking soda into a disposable cup, then have her pee in it. If the baking soda fizzes, it’s a boy. If not, it’s a girl.
Apparently she can also put salt on her breasts before you go to sleep. If it’s moist in the morning, you’re having a baby girl.
Mom, mom, mom. All the tests are about mom – geez! It’s almost as if she’s the one carrying the baby – even if you’ve made it very clear to everyone that “we’re” pregnant. So here are a few predictors that apply to just you, daddy-o.
Have you suddenly been gaining weight? It’s a girl.
Were you looking over your right shoulder at the full moon during baby-making time? Of course you were. Congrats, you’ll be fathering a boy.
Have you been nauseous? Some cultures believe if the dad is experiencing morning sickness too, you’re expecting a boy. Or maybe you’re the pregnant one… Remember, even Arnold Schwarzenegger got knocked-up once!
What other methods did we miss? Do you have any success stories with the ones above? Please share your thoughts in the comments below!